Harvey Ruvin, Miami-Dade Clerk of Courts, has asked for a superfund to deal with the problem of sea level rise in the Miami area. And it’s all because sea level rise threatens $6 trillion worth of property. And the water supply, as saltwater continues to intrude into the groundwater. And the lives of millions of South Floridians.
Doesn’t he know? CO2 is plant food!
Sea level has already risen enough that when Miami gets a very high tide — which happens regularly — it floods. Sometimes quite badly (like, just recently). But don’t worry, Miami. After all, Marco Rubio and Jeb Bush aren’t worried about that. They’re not scientists!
Besides, the miracle plant food CO2 will rescue you. Just plant a bunch of trees under all the big buildings in Miami. And under all the hotels. And under all the roads. And houses. Then, as the trees grow (which they’ll do super-fast because CO2 is plant food), they’ll lift the entire city above the rising tides due to global warming.
Besides, did you know that at its deepest the ocean is 12,100 feet deep? Why plot sea level in such an alarming fashion, like this for the data from Church & White:
Why not plot it as sea level above the deepest depths of the ocean, the “Challenger Deep” in the Marianis trench?
I’m sure Marco Rubio and Jeb Bush will enjoy that. Along with Donald Trump, Ben Carson, and all the rest of the republican presidential candidates.
As for heat waves — why worry? The more heat waves happen, and the hotter they get, the more air conditioning Miami-Dade residents and visitors will use. That’ll be a boom to the air-conditioning economy in south Florida. As for all the energy needed to power that extra air conditioning, it just gives us a chance to burn more fossil fuels, pumping more CO2 into the air, which will help all the trees under the buildings and hotels and roads and houses grow even faster … because CO2 is plant food.